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<info>
<title>L. A. Exists</title>
<volumenum>6</volumenum>
<issuenum>121</issuenum>
<pubdate>2003-11-29</pubdate>
<date>$Date$</date>
<author><personname>
<firstname>Norman</firstname><surname>Walsh</surname>
</personname></author>
<copyright><year>2003</year><holder>Norman Walsh</holder></copyright>
<abstract>
<para>Los Angeles exists. I’ve seen it. I’ve driven along Sunset Blvd, crossed
over Wilshire Blvd and Santa Monaca Blvd, I bet I’ve even been
in 90210.
</para>
</abstract>
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<epigraph>
<attribution><personname>
<firstname>Russell</firstname><surname>Crowe</surname>
</personname></attribution>
<para xml:id='p1'>I'd move to Los Angeles if Australia and New Zealand were
swallowed up by a huge tidal wave, if there was bubonic plague in
Europe and if the continent of Africa disappeared from some Martian
attack.</para>
</epigraph>

<para xml:id='p2'>Los Angeles exists. I’ve seen it. I’ve driven along Sunset Blvd, crossed
over Wilshire Blvd and Santa Monaca Blvd, I bet I’ve even been
in 90210. I’ve seen the Beverley Hills sign and the Whiskey-A-Go-Go. I’ve passed
through Bel Air and Brentwood and Pacific Palisades.</para>

<para xml:id='p3'>I suppose I felt the same way about Broadway and 42nd Street the first
time I saw them. And Trafalgar Square, too. I know I felt it when I stood on
Hadrian’s Wall.</para>

<para xml:id='p4'>But L.A. in particular seems magical right now. And I mean that
in a good way. We’re out here for an exciting reason that seems a little
unreal and magical too. But this is Hollywood, so a little drama seems
appropriate. I’ll let the suspense build for a bit. That’s what a good director
would do.</para>

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<para xml:id='p5'>A few observations:</para>

<orderedlist>
<listitem><para xml:id='p6'>While I can attest that L.A. really exists, so did
<link xlink:href="http://www.randynewman.com/tip.html#1">Randy Newman</link><indexterm>
<primary>Newman</primary><secondary>Randy</secondary></indexterm> and
Cheryl Crow<indexterm><primary>Crow</primary><secondary>Cheryl</secondary>
</indexterm>. If you didn’t believe them, why would you believe me?
</para></listitem>
<listitem><para xml:id='p7'>If push came to shove, I don’t think I could prove I exist.
</para></listitem>
<listitem>
<para xml:id='p8'>If you stand on the shores of the Pacific Ocean and put
your back to L.A., it’s quite possible to convince yourself that it doesn’t,
in fact, exist.
</para></listitem>
</orderedlist>

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