Day of the Iguana

Volume 7, Issue 77; 07 May 2004; last modified 08 Oct 2010

Eating tips for iguanas, in case, Kafkaesque, you should wake up one morning and find that you’ve turned into one.

Sun, sand, snorkle, yada, yada, perfect, yada.

Eating tips for iguanas, in case, Kafkaesque, you should wake up one morning and find that you’ve turned into one.

Up Close and Personal
Up Close and Personal
  1. Do not assume that you have particularly good eyesight. That juicy hunk of orange and that great big dumb mammal’s finger are in close proximity. Grab one and hold on for dear life.

  2. Your teeth are very, very small.

  3. Your teeth are very, very sharp.

  4. When you bite down, do it like you mean it. If the thing you bit down on doesn’t squish into fruity goodness immediately, shake your head a little and take another good, hard bite. Repeat until fruity goodness is achieved or the bloody stump is pulled from your vice-like jaws.

  5. If you did miss, the fruit is probably lying on the sand now. Grab it and run.

  6. Always come back for more. Some of those mammals don’t learn so good from exerience.

Fruity Goodness
Fruity Goodness
Iguana
Iguana
Iguana
Iguana

Paddling about in a kayak, assuming you’re no longer an iguana, is also a very relaxing way to spend the afternoon. Mind the wake from those parasailing boats, though.